Jillian Tamaki, the lady behind the Penguin Threads series of embroidered book covers, has made a handy guide to ‘sexy’ options for ladies’ Hallowe’en costumes.

“Sexy Virginia Woolf” is in line with a costume I talk about executing every year,”Sexy Margaret Thatcher”, with sensible patent leather pumps over fishnetted legs, red powerblazer unbuttoned, suit skirt hiked up. Puffy gray-brown wig, thin red puckered lips. Can you imagine anything more terrifying? Likely not, if you were a British miner in the 80’s. But since I never go out for Hallowe’en, (Toronto Hallow’s Eve events seem to be based around standing in line for hours) this costume has never actually seen the light of day (or night).

A friend-of-a-friend went as “Sexy Mustard” last year, to my great envy; I would repost the photo here if I knew her at all well enough to ask her permission. I do not, so you will have to use your imagination.